I went to a sad wedding
Even the cake was in tiers.
I went to a sad wedding
I went to a sad wedding
Even the cake was in tiers.
Kiwis, Trevor and Jeanette, are walking down a street in Bondi in Sydney.
Trevor happens to look in one of the shop windows and sees a sign that catches his eye. The sign said “Suits $10.00 each, Shirts $4.00 each, Trousers $5.00 per pair”.
Trevor says to his pal, “Jeanette, look! We could buy a whole lot of those, and whin we get beck to InZid, we could make a fortune”.
“Now whin we go unto the shop, you be quiet, okay? Jist lit me do all the talking cause uf they hear our accint, they might not be nice to us. I’ll speak in my bist Aussie ixcint.”’
‘No worries’, smiled Jeanette, ‘I’ll keep my mouth shut.’
They go in and Trevor says, ‘I’ll take fufty suits et $10.00 each, 100 shirts et $4.00 each, and fufty pairs of trousers et $5.00 each. I’ll beck up my truck and…’
The owner of the shop interrupts, ‘You’re from New Zealand, aren’t you?’
‘Well… Yis,’ says a surprised Trevor. ‘How the hill dud you know thet?’
The owner says, ‘This is a dry cleaners!’
Two old women are sitting on a porch smoking cigarettes.
Ask they are smoking, it begins to rain. The first woman’s cigarette gets wet and goes out. As she looks at her friend, she sees something fascinating unfold.
Her friend has brought out a condom and a pair of small sewing scissors. She unrolls the condom, cuts off the end of it, and slips it over her cigarette like a tiny raincoat and continues smoking.
“Why Ethyl!” the first lady exclaims, “where on earth did you get that?”
“Oh just at the pharmacy down the road, Doris, I pick a few up every time the forecast says it might rain. I do hate to waste a perfectly good Marlboro.”
The next day, Doris checks the forecast and thinks it might be a good idea to get herself a few condoms for her cigarettes as well. When she arrives at the pharmacy and is standing in front of the shelf of condoms, she realizes she doesn’t know what size she needs as she smokes a different brand of a cigarette than Ethyl’s Marlboros.
A staff member sees the old woman staring thoughtfully at the shelf and goes to ask her if she needs any assistance. “Is there a particular brand you’re looking to buy?” he says.
“Oh, I don’t mind which brand,” says Doris, “Just as long as it fits a Camel.”
looks like someone had too much idle time…
Now you understand why there was never any action against the Clintons or Obama, how they destroyed emails and evidence and phones and servers, how they spied and wiretapped, how they lied to FISA, had conversations on the tarmac, sent emails to cover their asses after key meetings, how Comey and Brennan and Clapper never were brought to any justice, how the FBI and CIA lied, how the Steele Dossier was passed along, how phones got factory reset, how leak after leak to an accomplice media went unchecked, why George Soros is always in the shadows, why Romney and Paul and Bush and McCain were all involved, why they screamed Russia and pushed a sham impeachment, why no one ever goes to jail, why no one is ever charged, why nothing ever happens. Why there was no wrongdoing in the FISA warrants, why the Durham report was delayed. Why Hunter will walk scott free. Why the FBI sat on the laptop. Why the Biden’s connection to China was overlooked as was unleashed the perfect weapon, a virus that could be weaponized politically to bring down the greatest ever economy and usher in unverifiable mail in voting. Why the media is 24/7 propaganda and lies, why up is down and down is up, right is wrong and wrong is right. Why social media silences the First Amendment and speaks over the President of the United States. This has been the plan by the Deep State all along.
They didn’t expect Trump to win in 2016. He messed up their plans. Delayed it a little. They weren’t about to let it happen again. Covid was weaponized, Governors helped shut down their states, the media helped shame and kill the economy, and the super lucky unverifiable mail in ballots were just the trick to make sure the career politician allegedly with hands in Chinese payrolls that couldn’t finish a sentence or collect a crowd, miraculously became the most popular vote recipient of all time.
You have just witnessed a coup, the overthrow of the US free election system, the end of our constitutional republic, and the merge of capitalism into the slide toward socialism. What will happen next? Expect the borders to open up. Increased immigration. Expect agencies like CBP and INS and Homeland Security to be muzzled or even deleted. Law enforcement will see continued defunding. The electoral college will be gone. History erased. Two Supreme Court Justices might be removed. The Supreme Court will be packed. Your 2nd Amendment will be attacked. If you have a manufacturing job or oil industry job, get ready. If you run a business, brace for impact. Maybe you’ll be on the hook for slavery reparations, or have your suburbs turned into Section 8 housing.
Your taxes are gonna go up, and businesses will pay more. I could go on and on. There is no real recovery from this. The elections from here on will be decided by New York City, Chicago, and California. The Republic will be dead. Mob rule and appeasement will run rampant. The candidate who offers the most from the Treasury will get the most votes. But the votes voted won’t matter, just the ones received and counted. That precedent has been set.
“Benjamin Franklin was walking out of Independence Hall after the Constitutional Convention in 1787, when someone shouted out, ‘Doctor, what have we got? A republic or a monarchy?’”
Franklin responded, “A republic, if you can keep it.”
Ladies and gentlemen, you will now lose your Republic and the rule of law based on the Constitution. You turned from the Constitution. You turned from family. You turned from country. You embraced degeneracy culture. You celebrated and looked to fools for legal guidance when the Constitution was there. You worshipped yourselves selfishly as you took for granted what men died to give you. You disregarded history, the failures of other great nations, and all it teaches. On your watch, America just died a little more. It’s likely she’ll never be the same again.
Some of you have no idea what you’ve done. Sadly, some of you did.
One Sunday morning, an old lady headed to church late..
… because she couldn’t find her hearing aid. As she was late and did not want to be noticed, she sat in the back, next to a clean, nicely dressed and innocent looking Little Connor.
The pastor began his preach. To have an example for what he was preaching, he asked, “Everyone who has committed the sin of adultery, stand up.” The old lady was wondering why everybody went quiet suddenly and so she leaned over and asked Little Connor what the pastor just said. He answered that the pastor asked for all people who wanted mints to stand up. Our nice old lady stood up, without a care in the world.
The pastor was outraged, he demanded to know why she had stood up. To that, the old lady responded, “I may be old and toothless, but that doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy sucking one from time to time.”
So, my grandma was out walking down the street and her neighbor, let’s call her Beverley, was heading towards her carrying her shopping but was walking kind of funny.
Naturally my Nan asked if everything was okay and if she’s alright, had she hurt herself? “No” she said, “I’m okay, I’ve just bought one of those new toilet brushes, but I think I’m going to switch back to paper”
What are the best kind of flowers to get your girlfriend after screwing up?
Little Connor walks down the hallway past the parents bedroom, looks inside and mumbles: And you want to send me to a psychologist for thumb sucking.